Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry Swizzle13 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(804): View more from Virginia

So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.

Fav 30 1056 1461
share tweet
(318): View more from Louisiana

tonight lets celebrate not being married

Fav 19 7218 1094
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(860): View more from Connecticut

Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.

Fav 10 3290 833
share tweet
(239): View more from Florida

Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...

Fav 17 8626 1685
share tweet
(856): View more from New Jersey

I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.

Fav 8 4135 1097
share tweet
(662): View more from Mississippi

We should reintroduce naked Mondays

Fav 7 2588 1035
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(414): View more from Wisconsin

Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?

Fav 11 1896 1323
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(847): View more from Illinois

He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.

Fav 0 741 543
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(357): View more from

Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing

Fav 4 10 77
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT