I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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