Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
