I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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