She announced her abortion via fbk
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
