ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
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