we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Randomize