"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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