Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
