i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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