if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize