i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Randomize
