My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
