He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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