grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
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