he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
porn star boner night. come get it.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
