She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
