i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Sacagawea was the original milf.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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