I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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