Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
