I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
