I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
