thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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