either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
