I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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