Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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