I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize