he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
i drank out of a bidet.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
