I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
