i just wanna soil my oats bro
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
