There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
