Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Randomize
