If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize