real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
