with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
