this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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