I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
