is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
