These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Randomize
