I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
