Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
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