You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
