Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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