6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
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You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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