My hand turned me down
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Are we still banned from the library?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
