Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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