He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
