i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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