What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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