The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Randomize
